Hang Tough

November is more than turkey-and-stuffing month. It is also the National Novel Writing Month. Go to www.nanowrimo.org, where the event’s organizers will challenge you to stuff a computer file with 1,670 words per day toward a 50,000-word novel. It’s not too late to start. How about using the weekend to catch up on missed days? The activity could help Ranger fans take their mind off....Well, they can try.

According to his critique group’s blog, Rory Craig Keel plans to give it a whirl.

Critique groups. That’s where friends do their best to help each other write better. To help you with the critique process, here are tips from my unpublished book CRAFT: Create, Rewrite, and Fine Tune. 

·         On a separate piece of paper—single spaced, because it is not part of the writing “to critique,” give your readers a heads up on what you’ve brought for the session. For example, if it is your manuscript’s first chapter, clear up possible confusion from the start. What do your readers need to know--its target audience, the overall setting, genre, --what?

·         If you want to know something in particular, spell it out: “Please concentrate on the hook—I know it’s weak,” or “I’m having trouble weaving in the back story—suggestions?”

·         Don’t expect others to know past details of your story. On your “heads-up” sheet, update the group each time you bring something, even if it’s a rewrite. Why waste valuable meeting time while each member explains what he or she has brought?

·         If you write fantasy, sci-fi, or the action takes place in unconventional settings, make sure your reader understands uncommon terms.

·         Use a readable font, double-space the lines, and leave at least a one-inch margin all around. At the very least, paginate your work. Line numbers are best. By default, in word processing applications line numbers are off. Computer programs differ, but to turn line numbers on, this should work: turn on Help (usually F1); write “line numbers” in the pop-up menu’s blank space; press enter. Click on the selection that indicates line numbering instructions.

·         Remember group members may not be great writers yet, but they are readers. The least talented writer may have a super suggestion. Listen.

·         Listen without interrupting. Wait for a person to finish a critique before asking for clarification or making comments—that is relevant comments. Why argue? Thank the member for the critique. It’s your piece; simply ignore advice you disagree with.

·         Certain people may have issues with material presented. Examples are extreme violence, vulgar language, or sex scenes. Use your “heads-up” sheet to warn them. If everyone considers your manuscript X-rated, either heed their advice on toning it back, or realize you are in the wrong group, at least for the piece being critiqued.

·         Be professional and stay positive. Hang Tough. Misunderstandings happen, but members of your group are merely stating their opinions. If they did not want you to succeed, they wouldn’t even read your work.

·         Remember these are your peers who may be rushed to finish in the allotted time. Expect them to miss things an editor wouldn’t. Appreciate their efforts, and they’ll appreciate yours.

An Attempt to Profile KittyCat, the Writer

Writing their own profiles is difficult for speakers and writers when their audience is described as “general.” Before they begin to write or give a presentation, they define their audience.
             
Even KittyCat does that. Originally he and his friend Snook wrote letters, one page or less, either on, or enclosed, in a card to Matthew, a child who had a medical problem. I think KittyCat envisioned the young boy’s mother handing the unopened envelope to him, and then once opened, mother and son would read the letter together. Now, with minor changes, KittyCat posts copies of those letters to my blog. He also writes new material. Maybe he imagines other children sitting alone in their rooms who would delight in receiving a short note tucked inside a card that’s addressed especially to them. 

During that time period, while supposedly catnapping, KittyCat was also eavesdropping on a critique group with the intent to organize snippets he gathered into a book and publish it. It is a gift book for writers, written primarily in light verse. In A Cat in the Corner: Conversations Overheard at a Writers’ Group, KittyCat managed to write primarily in the voice of human adults. It was easy enough, I suppose, because that’s who he mimicked throughout the book. In his asides, readers can catch glimpses of KittyCat’s true persona—


Well, now what? The thing is, a rule for profile writers is to stress the positive. A cardinal rule for writers of nonfiction is to tell the truth. KittyCat’s profile? Well, he’s a cat. He would add “a handsome tuxedo cat.” For character insight, you’ll just have to draw your own conclusions from his blogs. In his favor, he is warm-hearted toward children. If you want to copy one of his blogs to read to a child, I'm certain he'd grant permission (with limitations regarding attributions) if you ask him.

© 2011, Bernice Simpson

Smile and Say “Treats” -- by KittyCat

Bicklesworth--rhymes with picklesworth. That's the cat that beat up on me once. Scared he'd hurt me again, Mom wouldn't let me go outside for a long time. 

One day in a bad mood, I'm thinking, this is too stupid. Mom won't take my picture outside cuz Bicklesworth is out. So she makes this phony fall scene with pumpkins, fall flowers, and stuff, all on a grass-looking rug inside the garage. While she scatters silk leaves around--that's silk, as in fake--Dad is outside mowing, picking up real leaves and dumping them on the compost pile.

Ready to shoot, Mom put me and a treat on a pumpkin—the only real things in the whole scene. Ha, ha. I did a grab and go, and before the camera clicked I was snickering from a high shelf.

Mom stepped into the pretend pumpkin patch, and looked up at me. “KittyCat! I went to all this work to take your picture. Come here! This is so-o ridiculous.” All tempered up, she stomped her foot.

I almost fell off the shelf, laughing.

Ha, ha. Mom’s heel had hit the edge of a dandelion-looking plastic disk. As it flew up, it zapped a cardboard potted plant, and then both got hung up on a piece of wire. The wire you couldn't see before, now stuck out between pumpkins and other props, its leaves looking more like a string of broken lights than fall decorations. Startled, Mom fell backward into the bale of hay—you'd think a good landing place. But, with legs pointing up, she sank right through the “hay bale”—a straw-covered cardboard box.

She got up p-d-q, but the box stuck to her behind and hit this thing called a backdrop. It dropped—but not quite to the floor, cuz Mom was in the way.

I jumped down. All that laughter right after lunch jiggled the kibbles in my tummy and I got cramps. I puked on a pile of silk leaves—a pretty good place, cuz the colors in the up-chucked cat food blended real good with those in the phony fall scene.

Mom groaned like her tummy hurt. She stood the torn backdrop up again, but a paper bird's nest had traded its plastic branch for Mom's head, and a hobby-store sparrow hung from the witch's broom on her Halloween sweatshirt.

I looked at scrunched leaves, a broken pumpkin, the upturned hay box, and props turned everywhichway. Yeah, Mom, I thought, it is so ridiculous

The takeaway? --next time you’re in a bad mood, look around. You'll find something ‘so ridiculous,’ you'll laugh yourself silly.

(c) 2011, Bernice W. Simpson

Cut It Out!

A common comment in the critique group, Dynamic Opinions is “cut it.”

Try this activity from a Topics on Cue writing workshop.

1. Copy Paragraph I, but don’t look at paragraph II.
2. Without losing the essence of Paragraph I, rewrite it using about half the words.
3. Then, compare the paragraphs, including yours. Which one is the strongest? Is Paragraph II too short?

PARAGRAPH I

The timer beeped, and Ashleigh opened the oven door to remove the bread she had just baked. As it had for months, the door screeched. She thought kneading bread would help her get rid of the anger she felt. It had only reduced it a few degrees. When the door squeaked, she got angry with Don all over again, and she slammed the door shut before turning off the oven. The nerve-jarring, high-pitched noise reminded her of all the things he needed to do. He started painting the kitchen last month, but had not finished the job. He said he would replace the broken bathroom window pane, but it was still held together with duct tape. It frustrated Ashleigh when she thought of all the things Don consistently had neglected to do around their home.

PARAGRAPH II

 

At the time-clock’s chirp, Ashleigh opened the oven and retrieved a golden loaf of bread. Kneading it had curbed her fury, but not her anger. When would Don fix the squeaky hinge? She slammed the door shut and turned off the oven. When would Don finish painting the kitchen or replace the bathroom window pane held together with duct tape? When would Don do anything around the place?

© 2011, Bernice Simpson

A Picture Book for Fun and Laughter

OMG! Found on the internet: Ivon Cecil's picture book, Kirby Kelvin and the Not-Laughing Lessons -- $101.35. You read that right: one hundred one dollars and thirty-five cents, plus shipping. New and signed? Maybe signed, but that particular copy is a used paperback.

To think I gave all mine away. A book is my first choice for a child's gift, so they were not purchased to keep. I wonder if any recipients saved their copy of Kirby... for a day they might sit and read the delightful story to their children.

If you want to put a smile on a child's face, read the book to a youngster, or let your second-grader read it to you. From $4.00 (that includes shipping) or a little more you can find a used copy in good condition.

Ivon taught a course on writing for children at Amarillo College, and wrote a column on the subject for a national magazine. Finding Ivon on Facebook recently prompted me to see what she has written since I saw her last. It seems she is busy with family and a demanding job at present. Hopefully, she'll resurrect Kirby or create another character for children to enjoy when she retires.

(c) 2011, Bernice W. Simpson

Snook, the Brown Tabby -- by KittyCat

Aunt Pen had gone in an airplane to see some grease and a turkey. How smart is that? --we got stores right in the neighborhood. I figured she really wanted some R & R from Snook, her brown tabby. When Aunt Gay goes somewhere in an airplane, Snook comes to our house, and I have to be nice to her. But lots of times, she acts real uppity around me.

She's done stuff like this: Snook saw that I sent a card to this kid, Matthew, cuz I heard he was sick. So she sends a fancier one, just to outdo me, and she writes this highbrow note:

"My name is Snook, more fondly known as Snookie. I learned of your malady from KittyCat, who—hmm—actually my dignity prevents my speaking further of such a ruffian.

I selected this lovely antique card especially for you, and it is sent with a most heartfelt wish that you’ll feel better soon."

Sheesh! Does that make you want to puke, or what?

At home Mom laughs telling Dad about people who say mean stuff. “For a writer, it’s all fodder,” she says. I finally learned what fodder means. Snook gives me fodder, but to make sure supplies don’t run out, sometimes I give things a bit of a nudge. 

I got lots more to say about Snook, but I feel like I’m getting a nudge. Mom turned on the rug-eating monster in the next room. Earlier she plopped sheets and towels in a laundry basket, so guess I’ll crash on top of the dirty laundry.

Confusing Compounds

Sometimes compound words should be called confound words. A word processing program's spell-checker will usually red-line incorrect run-on words, but what about other mistakes? Don't expect its help when you leave out a hyphen, put one in, or neglect to join two words to a compounded one.

Just for fun, look at the sets of compound words below, and circle those that are written incorrectly. Are you cool with compounding? Answers follow. 

1.      Workday, workweek, working class, workingclass.

2.      Otherwise, lengthwise, pennywise, weather-wise.

3.      Windstorm, ice storm, waterspout, cold front, rainfall, weathercock, snow ball, weathervane.

4.      Cash box, money-back, paper money, checkbook, moneymaker, catchpenny, money order, pocket money, moneywort.

5.      Boat-rocker, free spirit, dogcatcher, dog handler, commander in chief, policy maker, fat cat, beachcomber, sleepyhead, pussycat, water rat, darkhorse, kill-joy, big boys, watchmaker, beach bum, catnapper, straight shooter, gadabout, beachmaster, double-dealer, freethinker, birth mother, redneck, blood brother, slimeball, fortuneteller, team leader, schoolteacher, free-marketeers, cattlewoman, blue blood, blue-bloods, Big Brother, office boy, chief executive officer, step parents, godfather, dognapper, cat burglar, cave dweller, black belt.

6.      Bird of peace, bird-dog, side horse, sealion, cold duck, hot-dog, jackrabbit, white elephant, workhorses, snake bite, bird dog, waterthrush, Black Angus, kitty-corner, water bug, bullpen, snake oil, dog days, sidewinder, tomcat, blacksnake, screech owl, tabby cat, KittyCat. 

Answers:

1.      All are correct except workingclass. Working class is a noun. Adjective: working-class.

2.      All are correct except pennywise. No hyphen when wise acts as a suffix to help a word express in the direction of or with regard to. But penny-wise which means good penny management, is hyphenated. Similarily weather-wise refers to one who is wise in forecasting—weather or the outcome of political issues. The following sentence is incorrect: “Weatherwise, last month was as balmy as May.” Most compound weather words are joined: windstorm, waterspout, rainfall, snowball, raindrop, snowflake, and even weatherman. But to confound us, correctly expressed as two words are ice storm and weather cock.

3.      Depending on the dictionary you use, all the money words are correct, but older word processing programs may disagree with moneyman and moneywort. In Canada, the moneywort question is moot. There, the moneywort's common name is creeping Jenny--logically expressed in two words.

4.      This list of people (yes, it lacks political correctness) is too long to make you strain. Although dictionaries differ in some cases, all are correct. But can you define the words? For example, what is the difference between a dognapper and catnapper? Why is Big Brother a proper noun, while commander in chief isn't? Are there cave dwellers in New York City?

5.      Correct--the verbs hot-dog (to perform stunts) and bird-dog, (to watch or follow carefully). Also correct is the noun, bird dog. Snake oil is correct, but if zapped by a snake, you have a snakebite. Joined, Seal plus ion do not make a word. Perhaps that is why sea and lion are separated. Three dictionaries refuse to recognize kitty cat, and especially not as a proper noun. But, KittyCat exists. See? (= ^__^ =). And I suppose he'll post something tomorrow.